Tuesday, July 12, 2011

We Must Carry It With Us or We Find It Not.

First off I wish to reply to all that commented.  You all are so kind!  It pleases me so deeply when I hear from all of you saying that I've helped inspire you.  I know how grateful I am to those who inspired me along the way and helped me through (like you Miss Cheryl!), so the idea that I am that to you all thrills my heart :D  You all inspire me as well.  When I read your stories, I am reminded of the first days of my journey.  How it was a struggle, how I doubted my ability to follow through, how I found it difficult to believe it was even possible to lose the weight.  I felt that way.  I was terrified.  But it's possible.  It is.  You can do it, and you're in control.  There is no, "It won't work."  It will work, as long as you stick with it. Sure it won't be easy, but the things in life worth having always require struggle. 

Secondly, I must admit that I'm getting a little excited at the prospect that in a mere 2 weeks or so my magazine will be in stores!!  I'm not even going to lie..I'll be giddy as a kitten.  I find joy in exact inverses in the universe.  They're meaningful to me...so when I see my article I will be vividly reminded of how many times I looked at those same magazines and dreamt the "impossible" dream.  Never knowing, never even fully hoping that it would ever be me.

Also, I have been struggling with something over this past little while.  Everywhere I go, now more than ever, every woman I meet is on a diet, or about to begin a diet.  I don't know if it's because I'm more aware of it now or if it's truly an epidemic, but it concerns me.  Clearly I support dieting, and clearly I encourage it...but I think we need to look at the bigger picture as well.  If seemingly every woman is dieting, what does that say?  That none of us are alone in our struggle to accept our bodies.  Dieting is serious business that requires will power and time and thought, and people wouldn't do it if they weren't seriously displeased with their bodies.  So here's the thing.  Dieting is fine, and worthwhile.  When you stick with it, your life will improve tremendously.  But during your journey, especially if you've not yet began it...don't be hard on yourself.  Just because you feel like you've yet to reach your potential does not mean you are any less special now than you will be at the end of your journey.  You are the person who is strong enough and brave enough to even dare begin the journey.  That says something!  Also, be reminded that your self-perception is often skewed.  We are intrinsically hard on ourselves.  Those that care about you often don't even notice the things we can't ignore when we look in the mirror.  Embrace who you are now, and that is when you will be empowered to become healthier.  If you don't love yourself the way you are, then you won't value yourself enough to get through this.  That's what made the difference for me.  Though I look back now and realize I was missing out on many exciting adventures, I also realize that there were days at 300 lbs when I felt truly stunning, unstoppable or truly loved and desired.  And that is precisely what aided me in this journey.  Until I found a reason to love myself, I didn't have the courage to discipline myself. 

I want to conclude with some little things to look forward to, and those of you who are well on your way on your journeys feel free to comment with additional things!  Also, for those of you who are doing this diet and aren't beginning with an obese bmi, you might not find these things wholly relatable, but at least a few will be.

So here are some things I've encountered this summer that remind me of what a difference my hard work has made.

  • the hottest days aren't nearly as hot as I remember!  I used to refuse to go outside with the temperature passed 85 or so, now I exercise out in 95 degree weather and love it!
  • Those delightful plastic lawn chairs with the arms that I used to avoid like the plague, now they're of no concern at all.  No creaking...no spreading of the arm rests to accommodate me.
  • The beach towels that used to not cover a thing, now cover very nearly most of me.  
  • Swimsuit shopping was a truly pleasurable experience.  It used to make me so depressed that I could scarcely cope.
  • The strength in my legs is increasing all the time.  I realize that I used to avoid walking uphill entirely.  No wonder I could barely do it.  Now I climb up steep hills like it's absolutely nothing.  And each and every time I do I can't believe it.  
So that's just a few things that I think about frequently, and that I am very much grateful for.  Also, it's things like that that gave me hope as I faced the most trying times of my diet, so I hope it does the same for you.

Happy Summer!  Be sure to check out FIRST magazine during the month of August to read my story and get some tips about the diet :)

Til next time!

-Brianna xx

Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not. Ralph Waldo Emerson

And this is something I found delightful.  Be inspired.  It's from www.self-esteem-enhances-life.com

Self acceptance is key to a happy, satisfying and productive life.
What do you pledge?
  • to life or yourself?
  • to others or yourself?
Uncover your life
  • Don't hide
  • Come out into the sun
  • Breathe the fresh air
  • Get the wind in your hair
  • Feel the wind on your back
  • Enjoy and explore
  • Make the most of this life
Find the beat of your own life. Find and experience and gain strength from it. Explore and bathe in it. Play to the beat of another or others and your search, if still unknown or hidden, will still be ongoing and 'incomplete'. Find your own way and your own calling. Be yourself.Quietly, taking the things in, taking the moment in. Taking in your own life.
That's fair enough:
  • Don't be afraid to stand up for yourself
  • Be reasonable, fair and polite
  • Know when to stand your corner
  • Give as well as take
  • Be comfortable with who you are and your contribution
You are your best friend. Rediscover how you - your best friend - can turn your life round and be the best you can be.Don't humiliate anybody. Rather build their confidence. Show you believe in them. (But first you must believe in yourself.)
If you're not good enough that's fine, that's OK. But don't make the excuse, that you can't do it.
Do you have a credibility issue?
Opportunities to do various things in life. 'I have proved myself to everyone.' Have you proved yourself to yourself?
Self control is good practice.
See the logic of life. All created for a purpose.
Don't fall for unsubstantiated promises.
Don't mislead yourself about your life.
'I learned to walk away when I needed to. It was folly to shut myself off from things.'
Appreciate life. Honor and respect your life. Make the most of your life. Give it your best shot. Don't scrimp and save for another day. Do your best today.



  1. You are looking great - I enjoy reading your blog so much and am always so inspired by your jouney. Thank you for sharing your story - the good and the bad with the world. And I absolutely cannot wait to buy FIRST magazine. I know your story no matter how great or small will be amazing and inspiring to all.

  2. Thanks so much Deb. That means the world. :) I feel so fortunate to have the opportunity to interact with you all :)

  3. I love how when I'm feeling down you just happen to make a post around the same time! I'm down 26.6 pounds. But that still puts me at 314.4. I'm not seeing much of a difference yet, but I am in my husband. 26.6 pounds in 25 days is definitely impressive, but I have always felt so negative about my body and myself in general that I always want foods that I can't have. Thanks for posting those encouraging words. It helps more than you know.