So this morning marks a new milestone for me on my journey. I saw 160 on the scales. I am only 8 lbs from reaching a normal BMI. It's still a daily struggle, but I've come this far and refuse to give up. Sometimes I worry about what happens once I decide I'm done losing though. This is who I am now. It makes me feel productive to see the numbers go down. I'll be relieved obviously and feel like I've achieved something great, but at the same time...the idea of it scares me. What else concerns me is that I've came to the conclusion that I'll never feel perfect. No matter how small I get I'll still look in the mirror and be confronted by an array of imperfections that cannot be corrected. I guess I naively thought that I'd eventually be able to be entirely pleased with myself. I suppose that will be my next endeavor...the next hurdle on my path. Deciding that imperfections are what make each of us uniquely beautiful. Perhaps that will be even harder than losing the weight, but it's something that has to be done...and it will be done.
Hope all of you are well. :)
I think this is what makes the Dukan Diet differently. I mean, in eight(!) (or more) pounds, you have stage three of stabilization to learn who you are with some clear guidelines/"rules." Some people want to be free of the rules, but I don't know about you--I find that an appealing part of the Dukan Diet. Because it is one thing to be someone dieting. It's another thing to BE a NORMAL-WEIGHTED PERSON! And the Dukan Diet builds in time to really become that person. I think that's comforting. I hope you do, too!
ReplyDeleteJust want to say that your story is really inspiring. You are making a difference in a stranger's life who is reading your story. And oh my gosh, you look so gorgeous!!!
ReplyDeleteBrianna I have been following your blog since I started with Dukan. Although my weight loss goal is smaller (16 kg) I know what you mean with above post. Meanwhile I am down 10 kg, my breasts have shrunk and I still don't feel like I am in the least bit happy about it. On the other hand I am proud of myself and I smile when I see the numbers on the scales. Once more it just goes to show that happiness cannot be based on your visual appearance. I have to start working at myself, but one step at a time :) all the best! - kimberley
ReplyDeleteThanks Tara. The diet most certainly provides a nice framework for lifetime preservation of weight loss. It's the mental aspect I'm more concerned about. Before, eating was my security, now dieting is my security. I just worry what I will fill that void with.
ReplyDeleteHi Ling. That is so kind of you to say. I had people to inspire me along the way, and to know I can be that person for others means the world to me.
Hi Kimberley. I'm glad someone else can relate. I should heed my own blog's title and recognize that beauty is an attitude rather than a physically attainable ideal. thank you so much, and best of luck to you :)